You never know what you are gonna get

So I have decided that whenever I expect a lesson to go well... it doesnt, and the days where they seem like they won't go well... They always do. Its a crazy thing, it seems so strange, but it has really taught me that you never know what to expect. Often times I see things that are going wrong in my lesson but I have a hard time correcting them on the spot. Today was a day I backtracked and tried my best to answer students questions and meet their needs in class. It was difficult, but they seemed to get things by the end. It was very rewarding to see them successful moments, and to see myself have them as well. The test is Monday. We shall see...

Everything has changed

My whole point of view on school, teachers and students has been challegenged the past few weeks. I know that I havent posted my thoughts and reflections of every day, but this week was my first week of taking over.
Little by little. And I shall survive

I survived

I survived the first few days of school. I havent been too involved in the classes yet, but a lot of that is because we had specific policies and procedures that we had to go over. I worked with the Spanish 4 kids for a few minutes, and it can be intimidating. I made the mistake of saying cincocientos instead of the correct word for 500, which is quinientos, I dont believe the kids noticed, but I was embarassed about it.
My confidence was a little shaken, but I realize that this year will be full of mistakes where I am just going to need to accept them and move on. I need to discuss those mistakes with my mentor, and if she thinks I should bring them up and correct myself to the class or if I should just move on and forgot about it. I dont want to take away my authority, but I want them to see that I make mistakes too.

All this coming week I will be jumping in a lot more, not as much with the 4's but with the Spanish III's. It will be interesting, and this will be my focus:
~Being Louder
~Calling kids out by name
~Having a teacher presence in front of the kids.

Its all very tiring at first, but like my mentor says. it comes from hard work and experience.

Okay, off to work. The paid job I mean.

Nothing comes easily.

Tomorrow begins the adventure. Just breathe.

PPI

My hours are dwindling at World Market, and I am looking at Ven Conmigo a lot more these days. Tomorrow I join about 80 students and staff members at Mott for PPI Camp, Positive Peer Influence) for the next two days. I was a member during my time at Mott, have chaperoned it before, and I am excited to join the kids again. It will be nice to get to know some of the students before school actually starts. Having a few allies in the audience can never be a bad thing.

I think this will be a good start to the year. I'll tell the kids I attended their high school... but not what year I graduated!!!

Opening Institution

Today was the opening Institution at Seaholm High school, where a lot of my questions were answered. First, and foremost... I have a confirmed placement! Very exciting!!!

Mrs. Dostie and I should have a good year together, and even though I will be teaching at my old high school, I believe it will be a good experience. The teachers have changed, not many are there that were there when I graduated, and the demographics of the kids has changed entirely.

Today calmed a lot of my fears and shed some light on what I will be doing in the year to come. I know that my focus class will be a Spanish 3 class, and second semester I will be teaching all 4 classes, 1,3 and 4. It should be great for my Spanish, and I hope to use Dostie as a good conversation parter and resource for ways to improve not only my language skills but my teaching as well.

Monday and Tuesday is PPI camp, which should calm my fears a little. And Wed, we get right into things with the first day for teachers. PPI camp should do a lot for me and help me get to know the students better, and make September 4th a little easier if some kids I've seen before. I can't wait to start teaching and being with the kids everyday for almost an entire year!

Ideally, I would love to visit a ESL class on a regular basis. Although at this point I dont see that becoming a regular thing.

As a gift from my Broad mentor, The First Days of School, is the book of choice for the next week or so. I hope all this comes together well and I make it through the rollercoaster that will be this year.

Successful Attempt

On friday, I showed my kids a slideshow of pictures that we've taken the last few weeks of school. Today, I just completed a DVD version, with a menu and title page. Very exciting.

Teaching is small victories

Today was it. The last hoorah. It's all over. I kept my eyes dry, but I will miss those kids dearly. They don't understand what I've learned from them. Really, its been great. I have emails from most of them, I would like it very much if they kept in touch. I am hoping that one day next year I will be able to go in and see them. That, that would be really cool. The cards they gave to me are priceless, and I wouldn't trade this experience for the world.



Teaching is small victories.

• Its getting that one kid who never writes anything to write 3 sentences.
• Its getting that one shy kid, to raise his hand in front of the whole class.
• It's the hugs at the end of the day.

Teaching is small victories.

So much to tell

With the few days that I left with these kids, I am realizing each day how much I have taken from this experience. These kids are my first class, and I will miss them a lot. We have been through ups and downs... And today was certainly an up. Just in the last two weeks, I have finally felt like a real teacher to these kids. And... I have certainly have learned quite a bit from them. Today, I leave a few words of wisdom that many of my students teach me everyday.

~Don't take things for granted.
~Appreciate the people and things you have in life.
~Kids are a lot smarter than we give them credit for.
~Don't try to hide reality from kids. They will see right through you.
~LISTEN. This is something we ask kids to do all day long, but find it hard to do as adults.
~They don't want their teacher to be their friend. They want an adult who shows they care.
~Pulling kids aside to say how great their behavior has been is a much better way to manage your class before it gets out of control. Kids like to hear good things about themselves.
~Tell your kids they are smart, and that you value them. Because you may be the only adult that tells them this.

Wow

There is just so much to tell. And I know when I look back at this experience, I will regret not writing more down, but so I am forcing myself to write now, even though really, I want to go to bed.

I cant even explain the experience I have had in the last few weeks. I can start with Friday. Friday of last week was interesting. Mrs. S had to call social services for a student, so she was unexpectedly out of the classroom from 10-12:30. Wow. what a wake up call. I was a teacher on my own. And boy did the 6th graders have a great time. The ran a circus, and really tried their hardest to give me grief. They could tell I was flustered, but I tried my best to maintain composure. It was difficult. I went home in agony, wondering what I would do with these kids and how I would reach them. One in particular is an instigator of it all and really knew how to get under my skin.
On a good note, the student is with relatives in another state, free from harm. At least I went home with that. That helped me sleep that weekend.

On Friday afternoon, I really questioned my decision to go into education. What am I doing here? I said, and I thought about it all weekend long.

Then, with a more positive attitude,after a night of survey writing and activity planning, I walk into school to find out my teacher fell sick to a sinus infection. Now's your time to shine, says Mr. G, and I was flying solo once again. Lets just say Monday went better than friday because they had more to do, and although Joe*gave me trouble like Friday... Not nearly as much... 7th graders are my haven class, and although there are more of them than 6th graders, they are more mature, and I can joke around with them a little bit more and then get right back into my material.

Tuesday, I came prepared to fly solo again, not knowing whether my co teacher would be in or not. And although the 6th graders were antsy and ready to be done with school, they got through it, and man was it a learning experience for me.
No! You can not go to the bathroom!
Rearrange seats to gain control.
Try and spark their interests.
Get them moving any way you can.

Wednesday, Mrs. S was back in action, and the kids were almost as happy to see her as I was. haha. They worked on some things, and Mrs. S and I scratched our heads to keep their attention for the next week and a half. Number the Stars for the 7th graders, who were really interested in the Holocaust and its effects. And short stories and spelling for the 6th graders, who didnt like the book we were originally reading, because they know that they can not talk about their lack of documents to be here. The Puerto Rican children dont worry, but the Mexicans have tend to quiet down during these discussions.

And then there was today. Before school started, I pulled Joe* aside to praise him for his excellent behavior yesterday, and that I was proud of him, an hoped it continued. He grinned, and walked in to the class, too cool to let me know that he was happy to hear my positive comment. Then we played a spelling game, and all the kids participated, even though some sulked because they didnt remember the spelling words from the week before. But the boys were the least disruptive I have ever seen--- even when Mrs. S is teaching. That made me so happy, and really set up the tone for the rest of the day. It was today, that for the first time, I felt like a teacher. 7th graders listened attentively to Dr. Suess's Star Belly Sneetches... And we compared it to the Holocaust and racism before we moved to Number the Stars.

My 7th graders are the ones that worry me the most, and they come to me with stories about gangs and violence on the streets. We talk a lot about what gangs are, and how they treat you, and the bad decision it is to join them... And while some are honest about not getting involved, the few that are most at risk... They know what to say to teachers...

Then recessed happened.

As I sat with a student who is eager to learn and has learned English incredibly well in the last year, anther student came to join us and said: Mrs C! Whats the worst thing you ever did? And I mentioned some thing that were I was not proud of as a 7th grader.. (albeit innocent and well mannered when you compare it to these kids) And he then continues with "Has anyone ever asked you do take the blame for something you didnt do?" When I prodded further, he got up to play soccer, so I am keeping my eye on him.
And from there, it was all a big blur. Rachel* and Megan* were an hour late to class.... for the second time this week, and their homeroom teacher had enough. He was them before class started, so he knew they were there... Then, because they have so many problems with them before, he sent them to the principal, and she kicked them out. As we were heading in from recess, I see a big group of 7th graders crowded around a bench, where Megan and Rachel were crying. It was here I found out that the girls had been kicked out... And we had a long talk about the colors they decided to wear that day, along with a group of 8th graders wearing the opposite color association. They both denied involvement with the local gang. And I hope that remains true. The 8th graders were wearing the the rivial colors, and started to confront the 7th graders. It turned into a huge ordeal, but in the end, no one was hurt, and a fight was stopped before it started. The principal stood her grounds that the girls were kicked out, and they hugged me goodbye today. I gave one my email address and said to keep in touch, because I cared about the girls very much and wanted to see them succeed. Mrs. S said that she is going to talk to the principal to try to convince her to overturn this decision. The girls live on the worst block, with a lot of street fights and gang activity, and their behaviors in the last week have shown us they are really at risk. If they get kicked out of school, the likelyhood of them joining the gang skyrockets and their chances of going to college, or even living to see 22 drops dramatically.


And even with all this mess... Today, Today was the day I finally felt like a teacher to these kids. The come to me, ask me questions, tell me their stories, and joke around with me. Today. Today was the day.
≈


* To protect identities, all names have been changed*

Short Hiatus

After a short hiatus from teaching, I am back in the groove of things teaching summer school in Southwest Detroit. I teach at the Academy of the Americas, a truly unique school that allows students to embrace the advantage of being bilingual... And I am not just talking about kids who speak Spanish at home. These kids take Spanish all the way through 8th grade. They read, write and speak in both languages. The school is amazing at incorporating Spanish into the curriculum. The kids receive instruction in both languages in all subjects, alternating by year. And just like native English speakers take English class, the students must also take Spanish all the way through 8th grade, when the students must leave the academy and move onto high school.

Because of my white skin and freckle face, all the kids associate me with English, many not knowing I could understand their conversations until much later in the week. When they do find out I speak Spanish, they test me, to see if I really know it, or if I can ask directions to the library, or order Taco Bell.

English is very much the language of official business to the kids in class. For the most part, the students talk to the other teacher, me, and each other in English, with the exception of the few that don't feel comfortable in their English skills, or when they don't want the teacher to understand them. Most throughly embrace their ability to speak both languages throughly, and "play" with Spanglish on occasion... One boy is experiencing culture rejection, and refuses to speak Spanish. Its very sad to see it, because it's his heritage, and it's his culture, but right now he doesn't see any value in it. He understands it throughly, but will not speak it, always responding in English. I believe he speaks Spanish at home, but in school, not one word of Spanish crosses his lips.

MRULE culminates itself in this urban classroom. The boys in class get much more attention than the girls, because they are loud, get out of their seats and are clearly off task. Unfortunately, its easy to ignore the girls, even those that really need extra help... Because they are quiet, can copy off each other, and usually stay in their seats. I have talked to one student in particular about using the word "A-rab"... And brought to his attention the fact that he doesn't like to hear others call him other racial names or he hears political campaigns stating that "Mexicans should just go home" He saw my point. And we decided that they are cool Arabs, Latinos, White, and Black people. And un-cool ones of each as well.

The girls tell me they don't feel comfortable around people that aren't their race. What? I don't feel comfortable around people who aren't of my culture. AH.. even 12 year olds know better than to pull out the race card. Outside on the playground, one little girl asks me to take off my sunglasses to see my eyes. What color are they? Are they blue???? And it was quite a disappointment I saw in her eyes when she looked up to me and saw the color of her own eyes. Brown. "I like blue eyes, they are pretty" The Bluest Eye is a story of reality. Even in 2007. Thank you Toni Morrison.


I have had the experience of teaching this week, and its been a struggle, but a lot of fun. The kids are great, but they will test you, and they want you to know that they will respect you only when you respect them. These kids are so real. They know they are growing up in one of the worst parts of Detroit, and they don't hide it. They have grown up way before their time and simply have experienced a lot in the 12 years of their lives. Most experience hunger on a regular occasion, most hear bullets at night, and a lot of my kids don't even need to be in summer school... But come anyway to be safe and stay off the streets. All the kids personally know family and friends in jail and gangs, and the entire school is still recovering from the loss of 8th grader in gang violence.

My short week has been very interesting and I have really learned a lot. I don't suspect coming out the same teacher I was at the beginning of this fellowship.
Each day when I drive home, I pray that my kids make it home safely, and that thank God for what I've got. Because once you've seen what others have, you couldn't possibly be so ungrateful. My kids haven't seen houses the size of mine beside the houses they see on TV and in movies.

And here is my final words from a student about Jamestown:

"The problem with Jamestown was that it didn't have any cash money."

And another little one that was saying goodbye:

Yo, see ya later teach!

The weekends are bittersweet, its nice to not have the drive down, but the nervousness I carry when I don't know what my kids are up to and if they are in trouble, I just hope these kids all make it through their weekends safe and healthy. Because I couldn't ask for anything else. For these kids, the weekends are long.

Time Flies

Today I did not report, because the kids are still on break. My last day is later this week. It will be strange to say goodbye, this semester has gone by so quickly. And I'm sure that the next three weeks will go by even faster.

Wrapping Up

For the last week in my placement, I have been simply wrapping things up, realizing that my last days with these kids is coming much sooner than I expected. I really enjoy working with these kids, and the relationships that we have built have been rewarding. I only see them 2x a week, and it took a lot longer for these relationships to form, but they did, and I have learned a lot from them. This week they are on Spring Break, and I will only see them once more before my time is over.

Having this experience really has made me value the power of relationships with kids. They won't respond to you if you don't know their names,and they certainly won't be as willing to learn from you if you haven't started to get to know them. I can't wait until I am in a classroom more than 2x a week, so that I can build this rapport with kids faster and will be able to track their progress easily.

And, thanks to a program at Michigan State, the Broad Fellowship, I will be able to do this before my internship year! I have been accepted as a student teacher in the Detroit Public Schools for a 5 week summer school program starting in June. I am very excited to work over the summer with kids, in a bilingual program, which will be a great experience both for my language skills and my skills as a teacher. I can't wait!!!

Field Teach Day 3

Today I did my last of the three field teachers, and it went better than day 2. The kids were much more active in the lesson than they were for day two, although because it was a group activity, it was harder to make sure that all the students were participating equally. The way my mentor teacher and I planned this was so that I would be teaching a review today, and tomorrow they have a test. It worked out well, Senora K did some reviewing of some worksheets they did, and then it led right into the jeopardy game that I had planned.

This 3 day lesson was geared to a particular student who is struggling in the class, and while I think the lesson accomodated her well, it could have been better. What ended up happening is that she paired up with one of her friends who does quite well in the class, and the friend ended up doing most of the work for her. This was not the orginal intention of pair work. I explained (in Spanish) that each student needed to have their own papers during our day 2 activity, but that didnt happen with this student. Next time, I'll have to do a better job monitoring my special needs students and supporting them when I let the class break to do their pairwork.
Another student in the class, Nathan* had a hard time today, the student didnt really participate much, and overall had a bad day. The student is known for his temper, and it appeared today to have really stuck out. Bad things really effected his mood, from getting a bad grade on a test to many other social issues that just seemed to add to his stress.

Overall, I am statisfied with this field teach, not because it turned out perfectly clean (because it certaintly didnt) but because I know I did what I could. I did stumble quite a bit on day two, but revamped my plans for day three when I reflected on what happened. I know more about making connections and transisiton... The kids needed more specific directions and more concrete examples than I gave them.

I learned a lot from this field teach, about how much review kids need, and how even when you give them a cheat sheet, unless you go over it in class, they will still get things wrong that they shouldn't have, simply because they didnt read it.

My interaction and comfortability is increasing each day. I know the kids by name, and that is one of the most helpful things strategies I have learned. Kids really appreciate when you know their names. a lot. Its a way that you show that you have picked them out of a crowd. (Even though I had to use the seating chart to start remembering them, I made it a point to connect with them after I learned their name, which helped me to remember them)


*student's name has been changed

Field teach 3, day 2

today was day 2 of 3....

On friday, I began my lesson, and it went well. I used celebrities to make it easier to talk about people without making things akward, although the students really didnt seem to bite. They did what they needed to, but they werent all that interested. They used my notes, which seemed helpful to them, and then as some students finished before others, they shared with their peers what they wrote. My overall presence was good, I am feeling much more confident in my teacher role.

Today, however did not go so well. The kids got what they needed to with it, but I had to clarify a lot, I was feeling under the weather, and I know I struggled through the explanation of the assignment. However, my interaction with the kids has become a lot better, they know me, and I know almost all their names, (mostly in Spanish, but I know some of their English names too) Because I struggled and didnt do so well with this, i want to revisit it on Wed, before moving on to the "game" portion of comparisons and superlatives. I have papers from the kids, and with my own notes on what questions the kids asked, and what I see from their papers, I will create a breif re-explanation of what is happening.

Akward Week

This week was especially hectic....

On Monday, I didnt see my usual group of 2nd and 3rd hour kids. The schedule was changed in order for the school to see the movie "The Invisible Children." (The Tree Girl assembly was last week) I had already seen the movie, and it is very powerful. I am very excited to see that the school thought this movie was in such high importance that they rearranged an entire school day. The school is starting to work with the movement to help the children of Uganda. They are starting to raise money with the schoolstoschools program, hoping to raise money to help the schools that are so desperately in need.

This week was also the ACT/MME testing, so Juniors reported, and teachers had to administer the tests. Because of this I did not report, because it would be extremely boring.

I start my 3 day connected field teaching tomorrow, I hope that it goes well. Tomorrow we will be talking about TV shows and comparing them, and the reasons why we chose to watch them. After this, we move on to talking about celebrities, and then a review game before their test.

Catch up!

On Wed, Feb 28th, Mrs. K did not feel well, she had quite the headache and decided to change her plans, and the kids watched a cultural video instead of the planned activities. As they watched, I corrected their vocabulary quizzes, noting that the kids either had it or they didnt. This is what I've noticed with language classes, there usually isnt much in between. It seems that either the kids are struggling--or they get it quick.

Last friday, the 2nd, I reported to school for my last day before Spring Break. The classes were restless and ready for the weekend. I go to my placement on the ocassional friday, but not every friday. The classes were distracted and not really up for much work. Third hour was doing a reading, so that left me unable to do much, except monitor and answer questions.

I have my three day lesson planned out, and I start it this friday. I do have some concerns in that it will be a friday, and so it may be hard to get their attention. Also, Mrs. K has said that she has not done a lot of pair work this year, and I have some planned. I am hoping that the students dont take advantage of this time and get off topic. I am going to do my best to monitor and model their work so there is no confusion.

This week will be quite eventful, because the students have an assembly on Monday (the author of Tree Girl) will be talking to the entire school, because the school read the book as a community building event. Wenesday, only the juniors report, because they are taking the ACT. So Friday (the day I begin my lesson) will feel like Tuesday. Hopefully it they act like it too!!

Failing Spanish Speaker?

Yesterday I did a lot of observations, I finally have a case study student that I will be targeting for our special education lab. The student is a very low reader and is not receiving any services at the moment. Mrs. K says that she doesnt have a lot of motivation, but Mrs. K said that could have resulted from not being successful in school for so many years. Its a chicken and the egg type of situation.
In third hour, there is one student in particular I would like to focus my attention on. This student, we'll call him Mike, understands a lot of Spanish, we arent sure if he is native and just pretends to not know, or if he is not native. Mrs. K says that his parents and grandparents both are native speakers, and Mike understands them, but is literally failing the class. He sleeps a lot and doesnt turn in any work. Mrs. K has tried to ask him what's been up several times but to no avail. She is disheartened, she doesnt treat any of her students differently based on their grades/performance in class, which is something most teachers never succeed at. Although she doesnt have a bad attitude with him because of his grade, she doesnt give him extra attention either. I'm not sure what the problem is here. Mrs. K says that his other grades are good in some classes and failing grades in others. She said that it seems as if he picks which classes to do well in.
From my interaction with him, he is a bright, intelligent boy, but something deeper is going on. I still am not sure what it is, but I plan on focusing more attention on this issue.

No school!

Last Monday I did my field teach, and on Wed I did not report because I was on a study abroad panel. The kids did not have school on Friday or tomorrow, so I plan to make it up at the end of the semester.
I have chosen my student with a learning disability, and I am working on accommodating my next field teach to help her in this particular class in which she struggles.

Field Teach 2

2/12/07-
I did my field teach yesterday and it went rather well. I had a slight problem with technology, because I could not connect to the internet to acess the radio clip that I had orginally planned them to listen to. This created an obstacle, but did not make the lesson impossible. I gave them the facts about Tortillas in English, and how important they are to the Mexican diet. Then, we read the article from the BBC out loud. This was a difficult task for them, they are only in a Spanish 2 class, and rarely see anything like this, entirely in Spanish and geared toward an Native Spanish speaking population.
The class was very hesitant to dive into this, they were uncomfortable, and you could tell this lesson pushed them beyong their comfort zone--something they are not used to.
I needed more time than orginally planned, but we got through the majority of the lesson, we didnt end up getting to the analytical processing at the end.
Something I did well: My teacher presence has improved greatly.
Something I need to work on: I need to know my kids names. I know a lot of them, but not all.
Something I learned: The kids didnt think they could do it because they were never expected to read something like this. Maybe more familiarity with this type of text would help them be less freighten of "real Spanish"

Grading Papers

2/7/07

Turns out that they did not have school this past Monday because of snow, so I am glad that I didn't miss out on a day where I could have been there if it weren't for being sick.

On Wed, I turned back the papers that the kids did for me for the subjunctive and went over the parts where I saw most kids were struggling. The work that they did for me was their introduction, and since then they had worked on it with Mrs. K, and seemed to understand their mistakes right away.
I really understand now what a chore it is to grade papers. I was only grading 30 papers, but it was a task! Last weekend, while recovering from being ill, I kept thinking to myself, be productive, and at least check those papers (because I wasn't being productive at all that weekend, I had so little energy) And every time I began to look at them, I would just set them back down, because they made my headache even worse. They just kept staring me in the face until Tuesday when I finished them. But it was hard to decide how I was going to grade, what to correct, and I wanted to make sure I tried to make an effort to really read what the kids had written because I dont spend much time with them, and I want to start building bridges and getting to know them better. Everytime I marked something wrong, I crinched, hoping that I wasnt going to be the teacher that grades harshly and isnt helpful in his/her corrections.


What I learned: Correcting papers is a daunting task.
What I want to do better: Get to know the kids, starting with their names and faces. (I know some, but not all)
What I did well: I made sure to write at least a sentence or two on each paper to provide feedback to the kids in some way. Some had questions about what they had written, others were what they did well etc.

Didnt Report

Today I didnt report to my field placement because I have been recovering from a sinus infection. I wrote my teacher and email to let her know, but I havent talked with her. I doubt that the Grand Ledge had school today, as most schools in the area were closed, but I'll find out on Wed.

Field Teach 1

Yesterday I taught my Spanish 3 kids the present subjunctive. The lesson went well, but I feel I need to work on gaining a stronger teacher presence. I often feel like a student giving a presenation to the class instead of a soon to be teacher. The students were very cooperative, and they asked questions. Because this was their first day working with the subjunctive (gulp) they had quite a few, but none the less, they seemed to understand it well.
I used the Dona perfecta lead in, and then the students had a work sheet to become more familiar with the forms.

One thing I'd like to work on: My presence
One thing I did well: Answering students questions and giving students the opportunity to ask them
One thing I learned: You have to know your handouts like the back of your hand to answer students questions without confusion and in the most effective time.